Note: this post, and any other post in the “30 day nephalist” category, has been moved from from an earlier blog that documented an important experiment – not drinking for 30 days.

Pep Boys are part of the Matrix

I am a fairly scientific guy – agnostic. Nevertheless, I tend to believe in synchronicity, that coincidences aren’t always mere coincidences. Or maybe I just believe that, in the right frame of mind, happenings fall together, meaningfully.  Writer Amy Tan explains this phenomena in a great lecture at my favorite website, ted.com.

I’ll give you two of my own examples of synchronicity:

I was preparing to take my 1989 Chevy S-10 pickup cross-country from Long Island to the great Northwest. I needed tires and a few other fixes before I left. It was the last day of my job, which was in a strip mall, next to Pep Boys (an auto repair chain). I was over one year clean and doing all the right things.

When I came out of work, my car was in a different parking spot, with four brand new tires. I immediately called my mother.

“Did you get me tires!?”
“What?”
“Did you buy me new tires?”
“No….What?”
“I came out of work and there were four new tires on the truck! Who do you think got them for me?”
“I have no idea, but that is great!”

I called my dad, my grandparents, and several friends, they all had no clue. I started to feel weird about it when I still had no idea who the secret philanthropist was. I felt like Pip in Great Expectations. I called Pep Boys.

“We’re glad you called…a gentleman with a 1994 Chevy Blazer came in for tires.  The mechanic saw ‘black Chevy’ on the ticket and thought it was your truck.”
“But it was locked”
“The key fit.”

I was prepared to negotiate with them to see if they could take care of a few other things wrong with the truck and maybe get the tires at cost, but, for some reason, I opened like a lawyer.

“I’m getting ready to drive to the west coast. I’m not under an obligation to pay for these tires. After all, you guys basically broke into my car…”
“Okay. It’s our mistake. Enjoy your trip.”

Recognizing a good deal when I heard one, I thanked him and hung up.

It could have been a coincidence. Many old Chevy keys fit other Chevys. Pep Boys changed tires every day. It could have been a coincidence that my ignition key was so worn that I had taken to leaving it in the column and locking up with the door key. So what if it was the last day I would ever park in front of that particular Pep Boys?  And so what of the coincidence that I needed tires?…And that my Chevy was black and of a similar model to the one that should have gotten the tires? Coincidences all.

The problem is, if you add all those things together, the probability is about one in a trillion. I choose to believe that there was a reason all these factors came together – I was doing the things that the universe knows are right. This is still a leap of faith but it seems more logical than saying, “One in a trillion events happen all the time.” They don’t. They happen almost never. One in a trillion is as close to impossible as you get. And what is a miracle but an act of the impossible. It just makes more sense to explain these coincidences as a benevolent alignment of events that become apparent to people who benevolently align themselves with the universe.
The concept of a “higher power” appears in six of the 12-steps. My working definition of a higher power is “the thing that makes doing good things good for you” – grace, synchronicity, or just that warm feeling that you get for acting with compassion (even when there is no one there to witness it).

My next example of a higher power acting in my life is…

Day 4

Yesterday was so incredibly full of good things that I cannot help but think of it as a reward from the universe.  The only thing that marred the day was a slight headache and about three brief but strong cravings for beer.
Here is a partial list of the great things that happened:

• I went on an informational interview and it turned into a regular interview. It seems likely that I will have a job as an SAT coach in the near future.
• I spoke to my Dad about his girlfriend’s mean emails to me. He agreed she was being irrational and unjust and the small knot in my gut untied. (I feel it in my stomach when people are mad at me, even if they are totally whacked.)
• I spoke to my Mom about my job hunt and my sobriety and got the encouragement that only a mom can give.
• I sent an email apology to a girl that I had cut it off with rather abruptly and rudely a few months back. (This isn’t really something that happened to me, but the further untying of my gut was certainly palpable.)
• I spoke to a friend who I hadn’t spoke to in a while.
• I saw, out of the corner of my eye, a fantastic book of essays by Stephen Jay Gould on the library shelf. (An evolutionary biologist, master craftsman, and bringer together of amazing details to illustrate fundamental truths, Gould just plain rocks.)
• I received a call from an amazing woman who is a life coach by profession, but also works for an organization called Enterprise for Equity. We talked some my small business ideas and she said that she would fast-track me in the organization’s business training program. The non-profit will supply me with all the skills and guidance needed to create a viable business plan…(I just need to pick one. Easier said…)
• I completed about a dozen things on my to-do list. (P.S. I am one of those GTD junkies)
• At our regular Tuesday poker night, I walked away the big winner. (20 big ones)
• All this and beautiful weather.

So far so good!

30 day nephalist, communing with the universe, overcoming addictions